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I have spent a good part of my life searching for answers to why I felt the way I did, why I did the same things over and over, and what was creating all that inside. My journey started out with a Twelve-Step program when I was 19 years old. And in that time period, that worked very well for me. I also spent many years in therapy with many different people, never really touching upon the core of what was governing my internal life.

When I was in my late 20’s I was getting tired and frustrated within and felt that there must be something more and some answers out there to all of my questions. It was at that time, that I met the author of the book, “The 55 Concepts, A Guide to Conscious Living,” Michael Cavallaro. I started mentoring sessions with him and that has continued until this time.

I am now in my 40’s and the Concepts have been life-changing for me, as I weave them into my life and all of my experiences. I am able to see everything in my life from a completely different perspective and have come to understand that life is all a perception. One of the Concepts, on that note, is ‘You cannot live what you do not believe.’ So living this particular Concept, and uncovering the beliefs that governed my life, have brought me to a place of understanding- I am fully responsible for my life … no more victimhood … no more blame! Which would fall under another Concept, ‘There is no blame things just are.’ and, ‘Life is a series of benign events,’ which means to me that, since I create meaning out of everything, I can change that in me.

The first Concept for me was a struggle and a battle in the beginning. The first Concept is ‘Anything that bothers you is your issue!’ Wow, that concept hit hard for me. Once I understood and stopped looking at all the surface reasons as to why this concept didn’t apply to me, I got the powerful message, yes this Concept is accurate! If I am “charged” in ANY way shape or form, by someone or something, then that is the red flag for me to go in and take an honest look at why that person or thing is bothering me.

That realization lead me to the second Concept ‘People are your mirrors and teachers.’ Every person that shows up in my life is my mirror and has kindly brought me messages of where I need to look further into myself, for what I may be judging about myself or maybe still doing that no longer benefits me. And once I am aware, I can change it! How beautiful it is to look at everyone and everything this way… as a gift for myself.

And lastly, for now, time to get a little funny on the third concept, ‘Be kind in all things.’ I spent many years mentoring with the author Michael Cavallaro and would go home after a session with notes and such, and almost always the words BE KIND written in bold caps on my papers. I would grumble to myself inside as I was leaving the session thinking easier said than done. To say I was resistant was an understatement!

So, I started with the outside and acted kind … even when I didn’t feel kind. Okay, that seems to be working, so then I had to look at all the reasons why I didn’t feel kind and go a little deeper. Eventually, the outsides started matching the insides and acting/feeling kind became less and less of an effort. Things started to change quickly after adopting the concept and people were more kind to me. I realized another two Concepts “You attract all things in your life” and that “Life is a projectionof your beliefs.” So, although I saw the outside world as kind, I realized that by my changing my perceptions on the inside, it spilled over on the outside. Now I am in a place of seeing this Concept, being kind to myself, as being imperative to my growth. When I am judging myself or others, I am not being kind to me. And since everyone is my mirror when I judge someone else, I am, in turn, judging myself…. there’s another Concept- ‘Be an observer, not a judge.’

Being kind to myself has been a wonderful journey back to me. Learning to love and accept all of me and owning it, all in kindness and softness has allowed me to see clearly and have the patience to change what I want to change, in any moment of time. We are all ready in our own time, in our own way. The journey is not to be judged or rushed, it just is.

The thing I wanted the most, in the very beginning of this journey with The 55 Concepts, was to find some sense of inner peace. This peace is what I have found. And for me, THIS is the place I can really begin my journey/life experience and choose to do whatever it is that I want. I still have issues, I still have life-stuff come up, and I still encounter challenges. Yet, the shift is in the way that I handle them, and perceive them, that has become so different- and that is the true inner peace I have found within me.

~ by Annmarie Serratore,